And it simply just is...PERFECTION.
It's all perfection. The not eating. Counting each calorie.
The bones. The hip bones, the collar bones, the ribs.
It's all so...perfect.
Maybe i'm going mad here?
Maybe this is all a moment of passion.
But to me..right now. This is all i want.
It's now the Christmas holidays. I can afford to lose..i'll only put it all back on after Christmas is over! I can afford to starve, after all the calories i've been consuming these past 3 weeks? I can afford to do this.
I NEED TO DO THIS.
For my sanity.
Maybe this wont be for long? But for now, this is what i NEED. CRAVE.
It's all too beautiful and easy...to leave behind.
To simply forget the way in which i lived for so long?
Who knows?
I guess this disease..or blessing? Depending how you look at it, has taken over a little more than i had anticipated.
I knew my "new way of thinking" wouldn't last long!
Right now..i don't care, i think i may of lost my mind a little!...Ooopps...
It's the Christmas holidays, who cares! :)
I need to be happy for then. Any which way possible!
Thin is beautiful right?
We are going to be beautiful :)
OUR BODIES
OUR BODIES
OUR RULES
OUR LIFE.
Love You All,
Astra x
No, be strong, keep fighting it! You're ALREADY beautiful. Loads of love xxx
ReplyDeleteit is all perfection, i completely agree :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Just Me, you are already so beautiful, you don´t need to starve, you deserve to eat and to be healthy, you can fight it, you are so strong!
ReplyDeleteI still know what you mean about how beautiful it is in a way...
Lots of love
xx
Thanks for the comment, hun. You're too sweet. :-*
ReplyDeleteI love and hate this disease. I want it, and at the same time I wish it would release back to the way I was. :/
Glad you're sounding happier, though. You deserve lots of happy days. <3